


Constructive Criticism

by avearia



Series: Phic Phight 2019 [2]
Category: Danny Phantom
Genre: 11paruline44, Booooomerang, Crack, Gen, Ghost Gabber, Ghost Hunting, Listen Jack is an Aperture Science caliber scientist and you cannot tell me otherwise, Mad Science, Portal References, Prompt Fic, Secret Identity, Skulking-around-the-phandom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-28
Updated: 2020-03-28
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:33:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23357830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/avearia/pseuds/avearia
Summary: From the Phic Phight 2019 - "Jack Fenton decides to combine the Ghost Gabber with the Boo-merang. Chaos ensues.""Jack Fenton shrugged. Well, not all of his inventions could be winners."
Series: Phic Phight 2019 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1679998
Comments: 6
Kudos: 145





	Constructive Criticism

**Author's Note:**

> This entry for the Phic Phight was prompted by Skulking-around-the-phandom, aka, 11paruline44. 
> 
> Written mostly for fun. ;)

**Constructive Criticism**  
-  


"I call it… the Ghost Gabberang!" Jack announced, holding up his newest invention under the fluorescent lights of the laboratory. "The Boomer-gabber? The— well, we'll work out the name later."

"…Why does it sound like you just combined the Ghost Gabber and the Boooomerang?" Jazz asked, wary.

"Because I did!" Jack said, thrilled. "Here! A brilliant invention like this one needs a _demonstration!_ Watch!"

Danny, standing beside Jazz, went immediately stiff and threw out his hands. "Dad, _waitaminute,_ don't throw the—"

But Jack, overeager, could not be stopped. He wound up an arm and loosed before the sentence even made it out of Danny's mouth. The silver boomerang whirled off to the far side of the lab, its flat robotic voice fading as it echoed "Dad. Wait-a-second. Don't throw the. Fear me…" as it flew off.

"Huh." Jack scratched his head. "Still repeating everything Danny says. I thought I _fixed_ that."

The Gabberang hovered in the air, suspended in the corner as its blades helicoptered, halted in place. Then it reversed course, swooping low. Danny ducked and dove to avoid it as the Gabberang swiped at his head, a patch of "—wait a minute, don't throw th—" playing on loop; it came and faded as the device retreated once more.

"…Thought I fixed _that,_ too…" Jack murmured, watching Danny dodge a second time, then a third, as the Gabberang took swings and missed.

Rubbing her temples, Jazz asked, exasperated, "So—your new invention is just two of your old inventions combined into one?"

"Yes!" Jack beamed. "It was _quite_ a challenge! Integrating two very different modes of technology, and getting the Ghost Gabber to record evenly while in motion—it's a technical marvel!"

"I'm _marveled_ that you can even _technically_ call this thing an invention," Danny grumbled, ducking under another swoop.

The Gabberang echoed; "I'm marveled. That you can even. Technic—"

"Shut up you dumb thing."

"Shut up you dumb thing. Fear me." The boomerang swooped again. Danny flung himself to the side, yelling a frustrated growl as he dodged. True to form, the Gabberang echoed that same frustrated growl back at him, then ended it in a polite, 'fear me'.

Taking a deep breath, Jazz recapped: "So basically, you made a machine that follows ghosts—and Danny—" she was quick to add, "and screams their own words back to them as it flies?"

"Yes!" Jack said, puffing out his chest in pride.

Raising her eyebrows, drawing her words out slow, Jazz asked, with concern thick in her voice; "… _Why?"_

Jack, delighted, opened his mouth to answer.

Then he paused. And closed his mouth, looking puzzled.

"…Why?" He repeated, perplexed.

"…Please tell me there was some other logic behind this than just making a screaming, flying, robotic death machine," Jazz begged, praying for some sanity in this conversation.

"Uh…" Jack said, an eloquent response.

He frowned at the ground, scratching his chin. "Hm…"

"Oh my god." Danny murmured. "Our parents are Aperture Lab Scientists. This explains so much." On the Gabberang's return trip, rather than dodge, a fed-up Danny shot his hand out and caught the device mid-air. Spinning on his heel, he turned to face the other two, slightly out of breath. "Listen, Dad, if you guys ever decide to make creepy turrets with sing-song voices, or try to download your brain into a computer to achieve immortality, let us know ahead of time, okay? So the rest of us can _evacuate._ "

"Aperture Labs? Is that one of you kids' newfangled me-me references?" Jack asked.

"It's from a video game. And Danny, come on, they're not that bad." Jazz said, though the last part of her sentence trailed off weakly and its tone curled upwards like a question rather than a statement.

Danny waved the Gabberang at his sister in response, then smirked. "Welcome to FentonWorks!" he announced. "Where we bend reality to our will. Here! Have a soup thermos that contains cosmic entities. Or a fishing rod! It's impervious to ghosts!"

Jazz let out a surprise snicker at that, though she was quick to suppress it. Danny, sensing an impending victory in his argument, pushed on. "For the duration of this test, we will have a screaming boomerang follow you, repeating your every word. I'll be honest here, folks, we're just throwing science at the wall to see what sticks."

"Okay, _Mom's_ not that bad," she corrected, earning an indignant noise from her dad. Jazz paused. "Usually."

"She doesn't get a free pass, either. Have you forgotten?" Danny pointed at the swirling green archway behind him. "Technically, they're already _thinking with portals."_

Jazz tried and failed to suppress a laugh that only worsened as the Gabberang's robotic voice started to repeat what Danny said. Jack looked back and forth between the two.

"So… you… don't like my new invention." Jack said at last.

"Sorry, Dad," Danny tipped a two-fingered salute at his father, dropping the newest FentonWorks invention into his large palms before turning away. "But the only thing this invention is telling me is, 'Hi, I'm Jack Fenton, and I have bad ideas!""

"Well, that's kind of exaggerating, don't you think—" Jack started.

"Hi. I'm Jack Fenton, and I have bad ideas," The Gabberang in his palms said, its robotic voice unrepentant. "Fear me."

"…Now that was just good timing," Jazz commented, and turned to exit after Danny.

Jack looked down at the Gabberang in his hands and sighed. Well, he'd done his best, but they couldn't all be winners. Back to the drawing board.

Oh! What about combining some _other_ gadgets in a more impressive way? The Spectre Speeder could certainly use one of those mounted turrets Danny mentioned previously - the Fenton Bazooka would fit the role nicely.

Or maybe he just needed to boost the usefulness of his new Ghost Gabberang, instead? Jazz did make a valid point that it had little use beyond annoying a ghost, assuming ghosts reacted similarly to how his human son Danny did. What could make a homing device more useful for ghost hunting?

Aha! —If the homing device could _catch_ the ghost! And the Ghost Wrangler net would do just the trick. He had to find where he'd stashed it - the last time he used it was when they accidentally wrangled Jazz, thinking she was a ghost, but he'd kept it around here somewhere.

It would be tricky to integrate a net effectively into the Gabberang, but it would improve the device's uses drastically.

Jack smiled. He could always count on his kids to give proper constructive criticism - now the Gabberang's effectiveness would be improved tenfold!

"Hi, I'm Jack Fenton," The device in his hands echoed, still playing his son's words on loop. "And I have bad ideas. Fear me."

Jack grinned at the Gabberang, reaching for his screwdriver.

He couldn't _wait_ to use it on Phantom.


End file.
